Saturday, July 19, 2008
hi i'm back! was just too lazy to post.
i bet nobody even reads this anymore except like 1 or 2 of my most hardcore fans but oh well. i just felt that i had to pour my heart out SOMEWHERE.
times are changing, and we can all feel it. it's not sec3 anymore. never thought i'd make some stupid post like this, like so many people have before me, but its true that this year really sucks.
well i guess after the hols my class kinda revived and stopped ponning school, but i still struggle really hard everyday, just to go to school. i dread school like nothing else, and i dont enjoy time with my classmates almost as much as i used to. i have no idea why, but i find myself hollow and empty and nothing's inside me to fill me up at all; not basketball, not my music, not my physical exerts, and nothing can make me feel whole.
so much that i actually asked joseph about religion, one day. maybe im just a stupid worthless boy but it seems that people like me who used to have such a bright future laid out in front of him might just degenerate into one of those stupid noisy tight-jean wearing ah-bengs that i looked at with disdain on the bus today. god damn i hate those tight jean bastards. but that bitterness again is just some way for me to fill myself up somehow.
i need to do my work, i really do, but sometimes i wonder why i even bother to do all this chinese shit. doesn't help me at all. i just need to pull up my gpa past 3.5 i think, and all's fine.
which reminds me, gotta get another new testimonial form thing from ms low. have no idea what i'm supposed to put on it for basketball though, since i suck so much at it. people wonder why i'm so crazy about my music, that is, post hardcore punk rock, because you know it's a really good form of release. no shit.
at least you came through, do you know how much brighter you've made my world? i guess you will never know.
if you say jump i'll jump too.
waking the neighbourhood; 9:53 AM